It was fall of my senior year, and I was attending one of the few financial services interviews I’d secured. The interviewer glanced at my resume, shoved it in a binder, and packed his belongings as he asked, “An English major—why aren’t you going to be a teacher?” In 2002, the market for investment banking positions was bleak for Ivy League business students with strong on-campus recruiting. For me—a state school liberal arts major with few on-campus opportunities—there was no market, but I knew I could excel as an analyst. I submitted my resume online, applied to roles on-campus, but most importantly, I leveraged contacts. I diligently pursued a connection at a bulge bracket investment bank, obtained an interview, drove to New York for the final round, and received a full-time offer. I was proud, but when I arrived at training I realized just how competitive the pool had been. Most hires had been retained from the prior intern class. Over the next two years, I aggressively applied myself to succeed despite having no business background. 

Ultimately, I was a top performer, given a third-year offer. Securing the role and excelling demonstrated that with tenacious work ethic I could reach any goal. This achievement was pivotal for my career. It provided skills that would be crucial to attaining later positions in consulting and TechnoServe.

I love food. Chefs are my celebrities. I’m the go-to girl when planning any event, from corporate dinners to romantic celebrations.

The problem is, so many restaurants and—especially for me, a consultant—so little time. Although I was excelling at my consulting job, my hours were the highest in the firm. I enjoyed my career, but I needed to preserve my personal life. At the time, the French Culinary Institute was offering a food-writing class on Thursday evenings in New York. I was working in Connecticut. Attendance would require renting my own car and leaving the client site at 3:00 p.m. I made the case to my manager and he agreed. As a result, I improved my personal and professional life. The class itself was rewarding, and feeling fulfilled outside work allowed me to perform better on the job as well. I thought back to when I was twenty-two and a senior investment banker had told me, “You need to find balance.” It took me three years to understand I needed balance to succeed personally and professionally.

I was alone in my room typing notes. I could have been anywhere, on any consulting engagement—except I was also hunched under a mosquito net in a dark, un-air-conditioned house with no electricity, feverishly finishing work before my laptop died. I was in Tanzania. A month earlier I was in New York. I was comfortable. I had a successful career and close friends. I wasn’t passionate, however. My nonprofit involvement was marginal, and I wanted to test full-time development work. I lobbied my firm to take an unpaid sabbatical—something only one other consultant had done. I was nervous. The move stalled my career, and I wasn’t sure my skills would have impact abroad. Nevertheless, it was the best move I’ve made. Professionally, my study was a success, has been distributed to eight countries, and will be presented at an international meeting. Personally, I had taken a risk by pulling myself away from my safe reality to test a possibility. Though it was a risk, there was a great reward: I was thoroughly energized about all aspects of my career, and I verified that I wanted a future career in economic development.

Analysis

The author has provided us a classic example of someone who comes across as personable, real, and thoughtful. Her stories are simple and her story telling style is involving.

Some might say that enrolling in a food-writing class by itself is not a great achievement. What makes the story work, however, is how the author exposes her vulnerabilities and her strife to maintain a balance between her work and extracurricular life. As she has grown as an individual, so have pressures in her life, and she has recalibrated her priorities at each step in order to successfully manage those pressures.

The author chooses to arrange her accomplishments in chronological order. They don’t have to be, but this works well for her because the themes show her thought process during her journey as an investment banker to sitting alone in a dark room in Tanzania charting her future path. The author has successfully beta-tested her interest in economic development via her sabbatical and convinces the reader that she knows what she wants.

Overall, the essay is successful because the author comes across as mature and balanced when she conveys what accomplishment means to her. 

Accomplishment for the author means understanding herself, overcoming setbacks, and logically charting out her future path. Do not fall into the trap of thinking that you have to come across as the next Jack Welch. It is great if you can differentiate yourself by your Herculean achievements, but it is more important to be original and engaging.

The message could have been even more effective if the author had found something other than chronology to bridge the three accomplishments. By focusing on how each accomplishment paved the path for the next achievement, the author would have added even more structure and flow to an otherwise solid essay.

From 65 Successful Harvard Business School Application Essays edited by the Staff of the Harvard Crimson. Copyright (c) 2009 by the authors and reprinted by permission of St. Martin's Publishing Group