Four years after I had initially set myself the goal, I succeeded in winning the National Mathematics Competition in Germany. Seeing prolonged struggle turn into eventual success makes this one of my most valuable achievements. It helped me form an “it can be done” attitude that has stayed with me ever since. I first learned of the competition during a summer program in 1990 where I met some former finalists. The following year, when I was on exchange in the United States, I had the competition materials sent over from Germany. I made it through the first two rounds to become one of seventy finalists invited to a weekend where the five national winners would be chosen. I wasn’t one of them. The following year I again advanced to the finals only to fail at the last test. I continued to work on my skills and when I made it to the finals for the third time in a row, I knew it was my last chance. I had to survive a grilling by university professors on an unknown topic, but this time I could solve every problem. Walking out of the interview I knew I had won. Three days later the letter arrived. It was a dream come true.

An accomplishment of a different kind is my work as an ambulance driver, which I chose as an alternative to military service. After gaining a qualification as a paramedic I started to man ambulances in my hometown near Düsseldorf. I worked both in supervised medical transports between hospitals and in emergency situations. My strongest memory is of the death of a child when we hit a traffic jam and could not make it to the hospital in time. I was in the back of the car with the boy and his mother. I never felt more helpless in my life. But there are also many happy memories, of the people whom we succeeded in helping during emergencies and of the many grateful patients on our regular transport services. During the fifteen months on the ambulances I matured tremendously. I learned to take on responsibility for other people when they needed me the most. I dealt with extreme pressure and human tragedy. These were enormous challenges to overcome, but every day I was also able to experience how gratifying helping others can be. I view my time on the ambulances as an achievement because I was able to learn and grow, but more importantly for the help we were able to provide to the patients and the community.

My third achievement is having a significant impact on the trading strategies of the currency options group at Goldman Sachs. I began developing my own pricing spreadsheets soon after I joined the group. Being in the privileged position of combining a strong mathematical background with the practical grasp of the market that our “rocket scientist” developers lacked, I was able to arrive at several innovations. While some enthusiastically supported my work (it would not have been possible otherwise), I encountered opposition from senior members of the group who lacked the younger traders’ quantitative background and feared that eventually innovation would undermine their power base. I persevered, using my trading portfolio as a trial ground. Eventually, the better ideas prevailed and my interpolation now forms the basis of the strategy that group uses to identify value in the market. I am proud of having had the spirit and ability to innovate our strategies, but it is the strength to carry on in the face of adversity that makes this my biggest professional achievement to date.

Analysis

Do not fall into the trap of thinking you have to come across as Hercules. It is great if you can, but such answers are neither realistic nor necessary. In the case of this essay, Martin shows maturity and humility by admitting his weaknesses and acknowledging how others helped him accomplish his goals. These traits make him humble and notable.

Martin describes how he handles adversity. 

Accomplishment for him is a process of overcoming failures and setbacks; his stories would not have the same impact if he had won the mathematics competition on the first try or had saved every person in his ambulance. He does not dwell on these setbacks, though, and instead focuses on how he overcame them. As a reader you are left remembering his “it can be done” attitude.

Martin chooses to arrange his accomplishments in chronological order. This works well because the themes of the first story resonate in the second and the third. Again, this level of coherence is not necessary, but adds to this essay’s overall effectiveness.

From 65 Successful Harvard Business School Application Essays edited by the Staff of the Harvard Crimson. Copyright (c) 2009 by the authors and reprinted by permission of St. Martin's Publishing Group