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Santa’s little helper - Harvard - Sample business school statement

In my senior year of college, I was selected from a pool of more than fifty applicants to serve as one of ten student directors for the Big Siblings Program. Shortly into my tenure, school guidance counselors reported that a number of volunteers had failed to establish contact with their little siblings. Refusing to accept this unfortunate but recurring problem, I resolved to change it. My initial reaction was to launch a supplemental recruiting effort to replace the inactive volunteers. The other directors, however, believed that a concerted attempt to engage dormant volunteers would be more effective. To that end, we contacted our inactive volunteers to understand their circumstances and discovered that many lacked ideas to engage their little siblings or felt uncomfortable interacting outside the university community.

In response to these concerns, I developed a plan to organize and advertise various on-campus group social activities. I excitedly outlined the project’s various benefits and offered to coordinate the group’s efforts, thereby overcoming the directors’ initial skepticism regarding the time commitment required. I organized the directors into pairs to brainstorm and implement one unique group activity, creating personal ownership in the project and an open forum for exchanging ideas. Recognizing that a compelling example could drive the plan forward, I took the initiative to plan the first event. Despite my personal embarrassment of donning a full Santa suit, the inaugural Holiday Party was successful, attracting more than fifty volunteers. Furthermore, three events implemented by the directors later that year resulted in 75 percent of the inactive volunteers ultimately contacting their little siblings. I was extremely proud that our efforts had enhanced the program’s impact, and I felt for the first time that I had meaningfully connected with my community.

This experience helped me realize that my drive to implement solutions quickly can cause me to overlook certain details when analyzing problems. Had I replaced inactive volunteers based on my original assumption that they were lazy and unconcerned, I would have missed the opportunity to devise the plan that jump-started their involvement. This experience also highlighted leadership strengths that balance this weakness. Most important, I am a good listener. Openness to others’ input allows me a broader perspective for analyzing problems and leads to more thorough solutions. Furthermore, I pour my heart into everything I do. My enthusiasm enables me to work well in teams, motivate others, and create a fun and supportive team environment.

Analysis

This essay is evidence that the right choice of anecdote will set you up for success. The author chooses a situation with a clearly defined problem, and then points to measurable impact as a direct result of his actions. The reader is left having to connect very few dots, ensuring that the author’s intended message gets conveyed. The more unconnected dots in your essay, the more room there is for the reader to arrive at the wrong or at least a less powerful conclusion.

This essay’s greatest strength, however, lies in the author’s subtle framing of his strengths and his weaknesses. He clearly answers that part of the question by pointing to a bias for action as something that would have made him arrive at a less “thorough” solution. But does this weakness sound like a deep-seated character flaw? No. In fact, many readers can probably point to circumstances where this trait could be perceived as a strength. Consider this outcome a strategic victory for the author. He leaves the audience believing his weakness will actually help him lead on occasion. Framing the weakness in this way helps mitigate this essay’s greatest cause of angst: leaving oneself defenseless against criticism. It is human nature to cringe at the thought of having to discuss our mistakes and flaws (which may be why some people fail to even answer that part of the prompt), but don’t run away from the challenge. Tackle it head-on, but like this author, be selective in your choice of topic. Do not use the essay to confess your greatest professional sins (that might preclude you from getting into business school), but rather use it as an opportunity to show how you have grown.

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From 65 Successful Harvard Business School Application Essays edited by the Staff of the Harvard Crimson. Copyright (c) 2009 by the authors and reprinted by permission of St. Martin's Publishing Group