Hometown: San Francisco, California, USA

High School: Private school, 96 students in graduating class

Ethnicity: Asian

Gender: Female

GPA: 4.0 out of 4.0

SAT: Reading 800, Math 780, Writing 800

ACT: n/a

SAT Subject Tests Taken: Mathematics Level 2, Literature, U.S. History

Extracurriculars: President of Asian Club and Chinese Club; Youth Ambassador for Youth Voices on China video competition; ran mental health advocacy blog with over 25k followers; wrote articles for Proud2Bme, an online community in partnership with the National Eating Disorders Association; led community service project encouraging healthy habits in low-income neighborhoods

Awards: AP Scholar with Distinction; National Merit Scholarship recipient; Biology Department Prize; Webster Prize for Outstanding Work in History and Social Science; Certificate of Recognition from California State Assembly

Major: Undecided

College admissions essay tips

Since childhood, I have wanted to know the why and how of everything. I always needed to find the answers to my questions, even if my quest for knowledge meant staring into a black hole of library stacks, Scientific American paywalls, and endless Wikipedia articles. Simultaneously overwhelmed and elated by the vastness of the universe, I thought to myself that to live for a thousand years would not be enough; I wanted to see everything, to understand every atom and galaxy and thought in existence.

I was never afraid to look a fungus in the face, to go spelunking through the caverns of calculus and colonialism, so when it came to discovering myself, I was just as willing to trek through uncharted and at times uncomfortable territory.

During the first two years of high school, my facade of overachievement hid a secret spiral into an eating disorder. By the end of tenth grade, I had two Abbot Academy grants, a history department prize, and a medical leave of absence from Andover. Conscious of the stigma surrounding mental illness, I cited “family issues” when my friends, teachers, and acquaintances inquired into the reason for my involuntary homecoming.

Eating disorders are difficult to treat because the afflicted do not want to be treated. But being sent home was exactly the catalyst I needed to recognize the necessity of recovery. I wanted to be able to think again instead of having my head clouded by starvation. I wanted to live a full and meaningful life. So I dutifully swallowed my medication every morning, waiting for my restored neurochemical balance to quell my quieting but continual urges to shrink myself.

Yet even as my mood and temperament improved, it was not enough. To heal fully, I had to dig deeper. I researched eating disorders and mental health extensively, reading everything from Gaining: The Truth About Life After Eating Disorders to Dr. Irvin Yalom’s Love’s Executioner, a collection of case studies on existential psychotherapy. From them, I learned to understand the psychological aspects of my condition and to restore order not just in my brain but in my mind. I came to accept that physical growth did not equate to failure, that gaining weight actually meant gaining life. As I abandoned my bad habits, the neural pathways driving my insecurity and compulsions to lose weight finally atrophied.

By the miracles of neuroplasticity and psychological healing, I began to live again. One day I realized that between movie marathons and all-night conversations, picnics in the park and four-hour physics worksheets, I had forgotten the calories in one hundred grams of egg whites, the carbs in an apple, the guilt I once tasted with every morsel of food that slipped past my lips. My cerebral approach to recovery had worked; it was not detached or distant, and by attacking my problem directly, I could solve it.

Overcoming my eating disorder was the greatest challenge of my life. Today I no longer live in fear of food and fat. My recovery inspired me to write publicly about my experiences and to support others through their own difficulties. I only regret wasting so many months suffering in isolation instead of seeking treatment. We must stop viewing mental illness as a secret shame, lest millions of people continue to avoid facing their problems and resign themselves to a life of silent torment.

Until we lift the veil from the darkest parts of the universe, we will never be able to shed light upon them. To live blindly is to live powerlessly. I want to learn as much as I can about the world around me, to seek truth at every juncture, to live the questions and pursue the answers.

REVIEW

Angela has written a brave essay about a personal struggle with an eating disorder. She does a good job introducing her story in a way that feels natural, weaving in her personal struggles with her desire to achieve outwardly successful. The beginning of her story will sound familiar to anyone who has spent time around Harvard students: Angela’s curiosity is common among many Harvard students. This essay is successful because she is able to pivot away from what makes her similar and toward what makes her unique.

As she begins to share the details of her struggles with the reader, her writing is effective because the themes she introduced at the beginning of the essay continue to shape how she writes about her struggle with an eating disorder. Detailing how her extensive reading and research led her to move past her eating disorder is powerful. It also shows the reader that the intellectual excitement she displays at the beginning of the essay isn’t just for show. When faced with a big struggle, Angela turns back to the intellectual curiosity she described in her introduction. This consistency is noticeable in this tightly-written essay that effectively shows the writer’s transformation in the face of difficult circumstances. Angela has taken the greatest challenge of her life and turned it into an effective college essay.

From 50 Successful Harvard Application Essays, 5th Edition edited by the Staff of the Harvard Crimson. Copyright (c) 2017 by the authors and reprinted by permission of St. Martin's Publishing Group.