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Never alone - Yale - Sample common application essay

Hometown: Huntington Beach, CA

Year: First-Year

College: Benjamin Franklin

Major: Political Science

Extracurriculars: Yale Precision Marching Band


Sample common application essay

Profile

Spencer Hagaman applied to twenty-three colleges, but says that he is glad he ended up at Yale. Born and raised in Huntington Beach, California, he graduated from a public high school of about sixteen hundred students, where he was an International Baccalaureate student, varsity tennis captain, and student council vice president.

Despite boasting a long resume, Spencer decided to focus his Common App essay on a story completely separate from his formal list of activities. He says he wanted to demonstrate to the admissions officers that he was more than just his extracurriculars and test scores—rather, he wanted to convey his spirit. Thus, he settled on a more personal story of how he became the “guy with the flag” at his high school football games—he would sit in the front of the student section, rallying the fans and cheerleaders to root for his school’s team.

Today, Spencer lives in Benjamin Franklin College and is majoring in political science. Although he has not played an instrument before, he joined the Yale Precision Marching Band at the suggestion of his first-year counselor. He started with a cowbell and is now learning to play the bass drum. Spencer is also interested in how music affects political attitudes and is pursuing independent research on the topic.

Out of the twenty-three schools on his list, Spencer says he is sure that Yale is the best fit for him. He emphasizes how amazing the students and professors at Yale are and how much he loves to learn from his peers.

“I have friends who are accomplished composers. I have friends who’ve worked on political campaigns. Musicians, artists, athletes,” he says, explaining that the university boasts a true “diversity of ideals and interests.”

Spencer’s essays include his Common App personal statement.

ESSAY 1 (COMMON APP):

Personal Statement

During the school day, I am an IB full diploma candidate, ASB Vice President, and the Vice Chair of the School Site Council, but at football games, I am the guy on the field in the front of the student section, rallying our fans and cheerleaders to root on our football team.

Despite my leadership roles, there are many people on campus who simply know me and refer to me as “the guy who runs with the flag.” Some of those people tell me their favorite part of the games is simply to watch me sprint up and down the field multiple times and wonder how I do not fall down out of exhaustion.

Sometimes, I wonder, too, how I stay on my feet during those games. Running on four hours of sleep, and after an eight hour school day full of tests and deadlines, a Student Council Leadership meeting, and two hours of tennis conditioning and training, I am exhausted by the start of the football game. Still, I sprint forty yards in front of the fan section with a thirty-five square foot flag acting as a drag parachute and slowing me down. By the end of the third quarter, I have run a combined two miles and am ready to drop to my knees from exhaustion. Yet, I have another quarter left to run and know that I cannot quit now because the game still is not over.

My parents raised me never to quit. If one starts a task, one must finish that task, and if one faces an obstacle along the road, one must overcome it before finishing the task. However, that is not why I keep running. When I am running with the flag, I feel liberated. The mascot stitched into the flag is a mighty Seahawk, and as I imagine myself as that Seahawk, driven by passion and fire, I fly past the fan section. I don’t listen to the pain in my knees or the panting coming from deep in my chest. I listen to the passion in my heart and in the fan section as we cheer our team onto victory.

I am not alone down on the field though. I have my trusty steed with me, my flag. Seven feet tall, with a fierce Seahawk stitched in cardinal and white thread on a golden background, my flag flies proudly in the wind as I run. Everyone knows not to touch the flag. I am the one who retrieves it before the game, I am the one who runs with it, and I am the one who puts it away after the game. What that flag represents is not Friday victories nor defeats but the passion and drive I carry with me every single day of my life.

That flag is going to be hanging in my dorm next fall, retired and resting from years of service. Hopefully, I will be fortunate enough to have the opportunity to bring that same drive and passion I bring every day to Ocean View High School to whichever college I attend next fall.


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From 50 Yale Admission Success Stories: And the Essay That Made Them Happen, edited by the Yale Daily News Staff. Copyright © 2020 by the authors
and reprinted by permission of St. Martin's Publishing Group.