Hometown:  Ann Arbor, Michigan, USA

Undergraduate School: Private, Harvard University

Major: Neurobiology

GPA: 3.99 out of 4.0

MCAT: 37. PS: 14, V: 11, BS: 12.

Free sample medical school personal statement

“River rat pride!” I looked up from the metallic charms in my hand as these familiar words rang through the monotonous buzz of the Ann Arbor Art Fair crowd. In front of me stood an old friend, with arms extended, ready for the inevitable embrace ahead. It had been more than a year since Kevin and I played our last high school football game together. Returning to my hometown for the summer after my first year of college, I had expected to bump into longtime companions and reminisce about days gone by, but I could not have anticipated how our next conversation would propel me towards a career in medicine.

Admittedly, my upbringing did not portend that of a future physician. I grew up in a family full of engineers. Gears and circuits filled my childhood, where I learned about the nuances of repairing a manual car window before my first trip to the emergency room. College was no different. A boundless road map of possibilities lay ahead of me, and I was committed to exhausting each option. Before long, the brain, with its boundless abilities and unsolved mysteries, became my passion. As an avid breakdancer, I struggled to comprehend how a single organ could accomplish so much, synthesizing my movements with the music around me while allowing me to release my emotions and anxieties. It housed my memories, my personality, my identity. The wonders of the brain fascinated me, but I did not fully appreciate its blessings until my reunion with Kevin.

Talking with Kevin that afternoon, I was expecting stories of new experiences and inspirations as he pursued his goal of becoming a teacher. Instead, multiple undiagnosed concussions had left him debilitated, a shell of the savvy, dependable teammate from my memories. He had trouble holding a job, often forgetting what he was doing or when his shifts started. Bright lights or loud noises made him nauseous. Even focusing on reading a news article was a struggle for control. “But hey,” he said, “at least now I get all the time I want on my exams.” I managed to crack a weak smile as flashbacks of hitting drills and manic coaches raced through my mind. A feeling of helplessness washed over my body as I searched for any actions, words, or gestures to help—but nothing surfaced. I wanted to help. I needed to help, but what could I do? My desire for care had been established, but the skills I needed had not yet materialized.

Searching for ways I could make an impact, I joined the Sports Legacy Institute Community Educators to increase awareness, education, and diagnosis of concussions by guest speaking at local school presentations. As a former football player, my firsthand experiences with the devastation of undiagnosed concussions provided a real-world lens for the student-athletes to connect with. The possibility that our presentations could prevent even one student-athlete from experiencing Kevin’s hardship filled me with a humbling gratification, driving me to share with more students, while still appreciating the substantial impact that helping a single individual could have. Working to prevent others from experiencing what Kevin had to endure filled a void, but I still yearned for more.

I found what I was searching for after shadowing Dr. Johnson, a neurosurgeon at my local hospital. What started off as a regularly scheduled aneurysm clipping soon escalated when she was called to perform an urgent tumor removal. Her composure in the face of adversity was both inspiring and humbling. Meeting with the patient’s family, I could not help but sense an air of vulnerability fill the room. The loss of control crept its way onto the faces of the family in front of me. The look was all too familiar, recounting the same emotions I felt in my conversation with Kevin. This time, however, the outcome was different. I witnessed how a few well-chosen words calmed the anxieties of twin sisters who entrusted Dr. Johnson with the well-being of their father, how her sage demeanor gave a mother the strength to stand stout for her worried daughters. I beheld the effects on friends and family when a loved one’s passions are wrestled out by injury or illness and saw how much autonomy a patient loses when he or she enters the hospital, searching for a sense of control once owned. Dr. Johnson’s ability to return a sense of that independence struck me. It became a goal I would strive to attain through a career in medicine.

These experiences have fostered an admiration of medicine that I could not have imagined. I saw firsthand the powerful difference a doctor can make. A career in medicine goes well beyond an interest in science, but is driven by an interest in people and a desire to serve those in need. Patients lose a feeling of independence once they enter the hospital, entrusting their well-being to the physicians that oversee their care. I hope to one day enter a patient room and return some autonomy to my patients. No longer do I wish to feel frustration and helplessness when someone is in need. Medicine offers an opportunity for me to pledge my knowledge, compassion, and desire towards alleviating the burden, for the patients and their loved ones.

Analysis

The strength of this essay lies in Brian’s ability to effectively showcase his commitment to and excitement for a medical career by weaving together two separate experiences, while also highlighting his ever-growing interest in the medical field. He begins with the first experience: his reunion with his friend Kevin. This moment helped spark his interest in medicine and led him to seek opportunities to impact the lives of others through the Sports Legacy Institute Community Educators, which helps to highlight some of his accomplishments. His experiences give insight into his ambition and fervor, making him an attractive applicant.

Brian provides a clean transition in the essay by connecting this encounter with Kevin to the second experience he had as a neurosurgeon’s shadow. He expresses his admiration for how Dr. Johnson was able to exude a calm demeanor and alleviate stress when interacting with the patients, something Brian was unable to do in his initial interaction with his friend. He connects this to his overarching goal of serving others and improving the patient experience, demonstrating his passion for medicine.

From 50 Successful Harvard Medical School Essays edited by the Staff of the Harvard Crimson. Copyright (c) 2020 by the authors and reprinted by permission of St. Martin's Publishing Group