Under construction - Harvard - Successful business school personal statement

Successful business school personal statement

A scaffold bolt had just whistled past my ear. It was my third day on a construction site and I had been assigned six men to complete the foundations. I was only twenty years old and lacked experience and confidence, which the men were exploiting. By the end of the week, another engineer had replaced me.

My first reaction was relief, but that was soon replaced by boredom with my new filing duties. I realized that my lack of training and experience had meant that I wasn’t ready to manage a team. I met with the site manager and asked to shadow another engineer for the next two weeks to learn how to lead on a construction site.

I quickly learned the basic technical aspects of the role, but, more importantly, I recognized that the other engineers had a directive style, in contrast to my desire to lead by consensus. My problems had been largely caused by my leadership style, which had not been appropriate for the situation and which I had not adjusted appropriately.

After two weeks, I persuaded the site manager to give me another team. At the start of this role I adopted an authoritative manner, which was similar to that expected by the team of laborers. Once I had developed a working relationship of mutual respect with the team, I was able to relax some aspects of the direct management approach and build a rapport with the men.

This experience allowed me to practice different leadership styles and to understand the need to adapt my approach to suit the situation, the individual, and the team. I also learned about the role of confidence and credibility when leading a team, as well as the importance of training and mentoring for new starters.

Analysis

In recounting the story of a setback in the workplace, Chris delivers a well-crafted narrative with pertinent lessons. With the detail of a bolt whistling past his head, the story kicks off with a punchy opener, providing both dynamism and humor. By the end of the first paragraph we know the context and also the setback Chris faces.

The story moves on quickly and Chris crisply frames a solution— the all-important element of a failure essay. He then drills deeper into the progress he makes, illustrating changed behaviors and maturity. What makes him stand out is his self-awareness, his ability to move swiftly, providing insight into his adaptive character. A smart move here is to tie in the evolution of his leadership style, which should be an important theme in all HBS essays.

This is a very strong essay. It is tightly structured, stylized, and presents lessons within an appropriate story line. Chris might have improved it slightly by removing some of the redundancy in the final two paragraphs and using the extra space to include concrete examples of how he applied the lessons outside the building site—whether in other work environments or in his personal life.

From 65 Successful Harvard Business School Application Essays edited by the Staff of the Harvard Crimson. Copyright (c) 2009 by the authors and reprinted by permission of St. Martin's Publishing Group