Upward mobility - Harvard - Free example business statement

Free example business statement

Each of my experiences has contributed to my long-term goal of working in healthcare venture capital. Growing up in Boston around a family of medical professionals, I have constantly been fascinated by healthcare. My father discussed the medical environment with me every day, leading me to volunteer at local hospitals and attend a Medical Scholar’s program. My interest intensified when I developed Hodgkin’s lymphoma in 2003.

While working in IBM’s VC group, I participated in a number of internal ventures to nurture start-ups to success. I learned the fundamentals of fund management, and have seen the importance of financially supporting innovators who could develop life-changing technologies, such as the transdermal patch, which may soon allow cancer patients to painlessly receive chemotherapy.

A venture capitalist requires not only business skills but also an intense commitment to the goals that these start-ups represent. With my family’s background in healthcare, my own ordeal as a patient, and my experience with start-ups at IBM, I have become committed to a life that makes the sum total of my experience available to others. Before transitioning into VC, however, I plan to work in business development in a pharmaceutical company to gain domain expertise and applicable skills. Surviving Hodgkin’s has given me a renewed determination to pursue my goals now, and a Harvard MBA will provide me with the structural framework to achieve them.

Through simple observation, I’ve discovered that MBAs possess an analytical nature that provides them a distinct advantage over those without. In light of my VC bent and family being in Boston, I’m convinced that HBS is indeed my ideal fit for business school. I will learn from faculty of the highest caliber, and acquire skills in qualitative assessment and creative problem-solving. HBS’s legacy case method will offer me the ideal training for real-life situations, allowing me to develop a solid framework to work more effectively in VC.

The opportunity to develop a network at HBS will also be invaluable. I have visited twenty-four countries, travel to India every year, and speak Gujrati, Hindi, Spanish, and English. As a result, I appreciate diverse cultures and am eager to further broaden my perspectives by working with my ninety section mates. Additionally, I plan on engaging in the Healthcare Club, Women’s Student Association and Ski Club. I am looking forward to a truly transformational experience, which will hone my skills in such a way that I’ll be able to use business to improve the quality of life for both specific individuals and in the broader global context. As such, I will be an active contributor not only at HBS but also at destinations that follow.

Analysis

The strength of Apar’s response lies in its structure and clarity. Early in the essay, Apar articulates her vision to work in healthcare venture capital. Then, in short order, she addresses the factors that led her to pursue this career path: familial influence, volunteer work, personal health challenges, and prior professional experience.

Without asking for sympathy, Apar highlights her courageous battle with Hodgkin’s lymphoma and explains that it has “given [her] the renewed determination to pursue [her] goals now.” Apar herein not only addresses the critical timing component of the essay question, but also provides sincere insight into why this career path is meaningful to her. She then smoothly segues into how an MBA fits into her broader career vision and makes a strong case for why HBS is the program best suited for her.

In the fifth paragraph, Apar deviates somewhat from her message when she mentions her language skills and travel history. Although these stories certainly add depth to her personality, she would have been better served by tying these experiences more directly into her career vision, or using the space to specifically outline what she would bring to the classroom environment at HBS. In the broader context of Apar’s essay, these are small comments on what is an otherwise tight, well-structured response.

From 65 Successful Harvard Business School Application Essays edited by the Staff of the Harvard Crimson. Copyright (c) 2009 by the authors and reprinted by permission of St. Martin's Publishing Group