Community - Yale - College personal statement advice

Hometown: Plano, TX

Year: Junior

College: Berkeley

Major: Computer Science

Extracurriculars: Yale Concert Band; Jazz Band


College personal statement advice

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“I was definitely not considering Yale in high school,” says Jacob Hillman, who transferred to Yale in 2017 from Southern Methodist University in Dallas. Jacob grew up in Plano, Texas, and attended a “massive public school” with a graduating class of about fifteen hundred students. Most of his classmates elected to stay in Texas for college.

“I wasn’t valedictorian or anything like that,” Jacob said. “At the time I thought there was no way I would get into Yale, so it just didn’t even cross my mind to apply.”

At SMU, Jacob double majored in computer science and music, often taking seven or eight classes per semester. On a typical day, his classes and band rehearsals took up his entire day. He wouldn’t start on his homework until the evening. Meanwhile, Jacob says, most of his classmates found a lot more time for fun as they took on lighter class schedules.

It did not occur to Jacob that he could transfer schools until he visited Yale. During his sophomore year at SMU, he stayed with a friend in Morse College at Yale. They enjoyed a comedy show, jazz band rehearsal, and a score of get-togethers in the residential college.

“I discovered, like, holy cow . . . at some point in my life I need to go to Yale,” Jacob said. At first, Jacob thought that might mean graduate school. But then a Yale student asked if he was transferring, and Jacob seriously considered the option. Yale was the only college Jacob applied to as a transfer student. “If I got in, I would go; if not, I was fine to stay at SMU,” he said.

Now a senior at Yale, Jacob affirmed, “Yale has completely exceeded my expectations, and I just could not be happier.”

Jacob majors in computer science—he shed the double major to allow for a more varied course load at Yale—and divvies his time outside class between a quintet of extracurriculars: Yale Concert Band; Yale Jazz Ensemble; a saxophone quartet; Code Haven, a program where Yale students teach middle schoolers how to code; and Matriculate, a nonprofit organization that pairs underprivileged high schoolers with college students to help them through the college admissions process. When he gets a spare moment, Jacob loves to take photographs, a hobby that he took up in high school but continues to pursue in his free time. He hopes to showcase a collection of black-and-white portraits of fellow transfer students in an exhibition before he graduates.

The busy schedule can be deceiving, however. “Sometimes it feels like I was working harder at SMU,” Jacob remarks. “I’m happier to be doing the things that I’m involved in at Yale, so I don’t necessarily feel like I’m working as hard.”

When asked about his favorite memory at Yale so far, Jacob describes Pierson Inferno, a university-sponsored Halloween party in Pierson College. Jacob, sporting a baby costume complete with a pacifier and a teddy-bear-patterned bonnet, spent the night dancing and chatting with friends. He says he had no idea that there were colleges where one could expect great community turnout and enthusiasm for a such a quirky, school-sponsored event.

Jacob’s essays include two of his transfer student application essays and four Yale supplemental essays.

ESSAY 1 (TRANSFER-SPECIFIC YALE SUPPLEMENT): What is a community to which you belong? Reflect on the footprint that you have left.

“I felt disconnected, and that Ware Residential Commons wasn’t anything close to the community I was expecting. I thought the residential commons system was a hoax.” I paused after this statement, and looked up to see 120 pairs of nervous, confused freshman eyes pondering my last statement. I stood behind the podium, still confident that this statement was a good decision. Living in Ware, one of the eleven Residential Commons on SMU’s campus, challenged me to recognize what it means to be part of a community. I noticed a lack of community in the Commons, so I ran for and became president of the Ware Commons Council. My goal was to create an environment everyone was proud to call “home.”

Every day, I am actively trying to make Ware a stronger community, and the goal of my speech to the incoming freshmen was to inspire them to want to do the same. I have seen and felt improvements in the strength of our community. A nervous, Indian American resident approached me and said, “Jacob, I just want to say thank you. Coming here, I was nervous I wasn’t going to fit in. But you’ve made me feel like I belong here. Thank you.”

ESSAY 2 (YALE SUPPLEMENT):
Write about something that you love to do.

“3, 2, 1 . . .” I gently pull my finger down on the shutter, careful not to let the camera move in the precious 1/500 of a second the sensor is exposed to light. I then quickly press the shutter a few more times, with the hope of accidentally capturing a slight sense of relief, or maybe even a snicker of laughter. I look down at the preview on the small screen, and my heart starts to race a little. The lighting is just right—soft and white, but with warm bokeh radiating behind the subject’s profile. I turn the camera around, and the subject loves it. They then turn themselves around, not quite sure of how this picture resulted from the seemingly average setting we are in. But that’s why I love photography—there is hidden potential everywhere. If I crank down the aperture to f1.8, opening the sensor up to as much light as possible, I can turn tall blades of grass into a beautifully textured backdrop. I can turn water falling onto a rock into an explosion of reflective color. Photography is more than just capturing a moment in time—it’s an opportunity for both interpretation and expression.

ESSAY 3 (YALE SUPPLEMENT):
What in particular about Yale has influenced your decision to apply?

“Do we really need to get there early?” I asked my friend, a current Yale student, in reference to a student comedy show that was going to be performed in Saybrook College’s Underbrook theater on Yale’s campus. There’s no way this thing will fill up, I thought. My doubts were quickly dispersed as we approached the theater—there was a line of eager students looped throughout the basement halls. After the show, I totally understood why the demand was so great. These students were incredibly talented, and the show was hilarious. This event is a physical representation of the vibe I got on campus both times I visited. Yale is a collection of talented, brilliant, and diverse students who support each other, building a strong community unlike any other. Everyone at Yale seems to have a place. Yale provides resources to help students succeed, but there is a mutualistic relationship—the students are what make Yale so special. When I’m on campus at Yale, I feel inspired—inspired to pursue what I’m passionate about, and inspired to help others around me do the same. I want to share my talents with the community and support my peers who want to do the same.

ESSAY 4 (TRANSFER-SPECIFIC YALE SUPPLEMENT): Please provide a statement that addresses your reasons for transferring and the objectives you hop to achieve.

I’m extremely passionate about everything I am doing at SMU. The opportunity to double major in music and computer science has challenged me academically at an exceedingly high level. A great characteristic about the experience at SMU is that the student can determine what kind of college experience they want to have. At SMU, I have been able to discover that I want the most academic experience possible.

All together, SMU has done an amazing job providing me with opportunities, both academic and extracurricular. There is nothing at SMU stopping me from pursuing what I’m passionate about, and I am especially thankful for the unforgettable relationships I have been able to establish with my professors and mentors. However, I feel like there is more that I can do, and more that I can give. I want to be pushed even harder so that I can live up to more of my potential. While I have nothing but absolute admiration and appreciation for those who have taught me at SMU, I am also excited by the thought of interacting and making connections with the professors at Yale. I have learned a significant amount through mentorship relationships I’ve sought out, and believe the relationships I could build at Yale would be the strongest and most influential to date.

I am in a unique period of my life where I can surround myself with people my age who share a similar level of passion as me. After visiting Yale, I noticed an inspiration coming from the students around me that, up to that point, I had not experienced at SMU. I realized that I am one of the few choosing to have such an academically challenging experience here on campus. When I visited Yale, I sat in on classes and a jazz band rehearsal,  had a valuable conversation with the Director of Bands, and watched a student-run comedy show. Even after leaving Yale’s campus, I remembered what I witnessed about the students and level of academic rigor, and was motivated to work even harder to accomplish my goals back at SMU for a few weeks to follow. I also remembered the connection I felt to the students that I met on campus, instantly strengthened by our common goals and appreciation of the education they are getting. The combination of increased opportunity, higher expectations, and unparalleled inspiration lead me to believe I can accomplish the most I am capable of at Yale.

At Yale, I would hope to continue studying both computer science and music. I have been in contact with Carrie Koffman, the Lecturer in Saxophone at Yale. This is the first year that Yale has ever had a sax program, and I hope to bring my two years of experience as a music major at a rigorous music school, where I play Principal Saxophone in the top Wind Ensemble, to this young studio. I plan to play in the Yale Concert Band, Yale Jazz Ensemble, and a saxophone quartet.

ESSAY 5 (YALE SUPPLEMENT):
If you selected one of the computer science or engineering majors, please tell us more about what has led you to an interest in this field of study, what experiences (if any) you have had in computer science or engineering, and what it is about Yale’s program in this area that appeals to you.

Throughout my life, I have naturally gravitated toward creative problem solving and critical thinking. I have scored in the 99th percentile for cognitive abilities, and pride myself in my ability to quickly pick up on new concepts. I figured that a path in engineering would most closely fit my skills and interests, however I had no idea what exactly I wanted to do within the discipline. I ended up picking mechanical engineering for its “broadness,” but made sure to go to a school that would facilitate a switch into another area of study. I took my first computer science class during my second semester at SMU—Introduction to Java. Both excited and slightly intimidated by the breadth of this new domain I was entering, I soon realized I had an aptitude for computer science. At the end of the semester, I created a culminating project called “improWise.” My goal for this project was to develop a program that allows inexperienced musicians to easily create simple improvised melodies over a looping chord progression. The summer after my freshman year, I took  an intense and comprehensive C++ class in Weimar, Germany with Mark Fontenot, a professor from SMU. After this class, which solidified my interest and passion for computer science, and at the urging of my Java professor, I switched my major to Computer Science.

As my experience and technical ability in computer science continues to grow, I am beginning to identify the true potential within the field. A huge area of interest for me is the collaboration between music and computer science. An example of this collaboration that I have recently discovered  is the idea of algorithmic composition. As a music major, I have taken many Music Theory classes, and have a very solid understanding of the mechanics and “language” of music. I believe this understanding is essential in programming a system to compose and create music. Yale has shown remarkable progress in this field through Euterpea and the Yale Haskell Group and, more than any other school, would encourage this exploration and provide me with the best opportunities to explore this realm.

In addition, Yale’s largely theoretical and mathematical approach to computer science would give me a broad understanding of the field, allowing for a wide range of opportunities and applications after graduation. Because computer science is such a fast moving field, this fundamental understanding would be particularly valuable.

I have complete confidence in my ability to succeed and excel in the academic environment that Yale offers. The environment that Yale offers would give me the space and the tools to both excel in the classroom and pursue my personal interests and passions.

ESSAY 6 (YALE SUPPLEMENT):
Why do these areas appeal to you? (Computer science, music)

“You’re a magician,” my friend once stated after I helped her understand one of her first Java programs. Looking back, I remember having the same thought as I watched someone program for the first time. My complete lack of understanding on the subject sparked a deep curiosity, an unquenchable thirst for knowledge.

Much earlier in my life, when I first picked up a saxophone, I remember it felt unnatural. I felt hundreds of mechanisms flexing uneasily under my fingers, and I couldn’t make a sound. I was overcome with a similar curiosity.

I am passionate about building my vocabulary and proficiency in these areas, increasing my ability to express myself through creation. I want to become the best “magician” in the world.


 

From 50 Yale Admission Success Stories: And the Essay That Made Them Happen, edited by the Yale Daily News Staff. Copyright © 2020 by the authors
and reprinted by permission of St. Martin's Publishing Group.

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