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Sample business school personal statement

“So what’s this farming thing all about?”

On my last train ride from Tarragona to Barcelona to catch my flight home after a semester abroad in Spain, I resolved to return after graduation for a more authentic Spanish experience.

In the last few months of my senior year, I found World-Wide Opportunities on Organic Farms (WWOOF). For $20, WWOOF provided me with a list of sixty-some farms in Spain that had agreed to provide food and lodging in exchange for a hard day’s work.

I had already bought my ticket to Barcelona before making final arrangements with the Masía de Ginero farm in Valderrobres. The decision to experience an agrarian lifestyle without electricity or running water was not popular among my family and friends, but I wanted to test myself, to leap headfirst into a situation for which I had no background and see if I could swim.

After three months at Masía de Ginero, I had done much more than swim. I became a part of the family and an asset to the farm, plowing acres of potato fields, harvesting olives, building a hot water system, and helping to demolish a three-hundred-year-old stone hacienda. I came to appreciate the need to conserve water and electricity, the value of teamwork, and the satisfaction of a hearty meal after a long, physical day in the sun. But beside the enormous personal impact the experience had on me, it also ended up shaping my career path.

On my first day as a field hand, along with other area farmers, I performed the annual community chore of demucking the açequia, the millennia-old irrigation system that delivers water from a nearby lake to dozens of farms in this notoriously parched area of the country. As I trudged through miles of irrigation channels, slinging sludge over my shoulder, I couldn’t help but contemplate the fact that without this simple yet crucial piece of infrastructure, this community would likely never have flourished.

Understanding the transformative effects of public works projects was a poignant lesson that I took with me when I returned to Washington, D.C., to find full-time work. I decided that my niche in international development would be to address the daunting but tangible problems that developing countries face, like impassable roads, lack of access to water, and spotty electricity distribution.

I will always believe in the value of reaching beyond my comfort zone, for without significant challenges, I will never truly know my full potential.

Analysis

This essay has a very catchy beginning and maintains an idealistic tone throughout. The readers observe the applicant as he goes through a formative experience working on a rustic organic farm in Spain. The overall story is well-structured and demonstrates that the candidate is introspective. The author is fantastically descriptive, explaining the rudimentary, simple conditions on the farm. The candidate also exemplifies commitment by following through on an unusual plan. In fact, this is the most salient point of the essay. The applicant shows vulnerability and the willingness to be touched by subjects that did not necessarily concern him directly. He showed his willingness to act and create change, qualities that would make him a fine addition to the Harvard Business School community.

Though the story is compelling, this essay could have been significantly strengthened had the author highlighted lessons he learned along the way. While offering conclusions are important, it is often the thought-process development behind those takeaways that offer the reader the most insight into an applicant’s personality.

From 65 Successful Harvard Business School Application Essays edited by the Staff of the Harvard Crimson. Copyright (c) 2009 by the authors and reprinted by permission of St. Martin's Publishing Group