Ten minutes before my orchestra and I were due to perform what would be my first symphony, our conductor called us into the wings of the stage for a pep talk.

I sat in a pair at the starting line for the repechage of the 1000 meter rowing race at the Youth Olympic Games in Nanjing, China. I had trained all summer, twice a day, six days a week, for this level of international competition.

Family is everything, right? For me, this is especially true. My oldest brother, David, has Asperger’s Syndrome.

As the lively thoughts in my mind battled for priority of investiga- tion, I was more than content sitting in an empty room with bland, white walls and a shabby, old mattress.

I learned the definition of cancer at the age of fourteen.

Two hundred and two Hot Wheels cars, each two by five inches long, adorned with flames and spoilers, lined the edges of my room. My mother would urge me to put them away and go play outside, but I never wanted to.

Since childhood, I have wanted to know the why and how of every- thing.

The event that has most impacted my life and shaped my identity was my mother’s life and death. My mother and I never had a conven- tional relationship. However, we did share a special mother daughter bond.